I figured this was as good a place to start as any, seeing as it is the major focus in my life right now.
Choices and opportunities and regrets will forever remain heavy on my mind, especially at a time like this in my life. First and foremost I am expected to “just know” what I want to do for the rest of my life, and I don’t think there is a scarier thought than that. My grandpa’s best piece of advice to me is: “Do something you enjoy, because you’ll be spending the next 50 years doing it.” To me, he will always be the wisest man in the entire world. (Put it this way, he does math for fun) All I want is for him to see that I have done something successfully. That is all I want for my entire family actually. I don’t want to be the girl that is given the world, I want to go out and get it for myself.
Another choice I’ve made recently has had some negative repercussions.. I made a decision in order to make myself happy, and in the process, damaged my relationship with a friend. Now looking back, I am starting to see that maybe I am better off without that friend, but it didn’t change how heartbreaking it was in the moment to lose her. What I am trying to say is a less-corny version of “everything happens for a reason”. The friendship was a bit toxic, and I have since matured and come closer to people who value me more. Don’t waste your time with toxic people, instead give yourself to people who give you their 100%. Easier said than done but I promise it is worth it.
With all these daunting questions on my mind, it is easy to see why I have become so indecisive about everything from breakfast cereals to the dreaded “what do you wanna do? Idk, what do you wanna do?”. AND THAT NEEDS TO STOP. Make decisions that make you happy, speak your mind and let your opinion matter. Stop using the term IDK so much. Most of the decisions are not going to matter in 5 years anyways so stop stressing. (also, if you skip the gym one day to take your sister out for a froyo date, that is definitely, 100% a good decision.)
I guess this blog has somehow turned into my diary to upload for the world to see. If you’re still reading, I am planning on adding some fashion posts, food posts and maybe some travel posts. A little bit of everything I guess. 🙂